cuīhūn: 催婚 - To Pressure Someone to Get Married; Marriage Pressure

• Keywords: cuihun, 催婚, what is cuihun, marriage pressure in China, Chinese parents pressuring marriage, getting married in China, Chinese family pressure, leftover women, shengnu, 相亲, filial piety.
• Summary: 催婚 (cuīhūn) is the uniquely intense social and familial pressure placed on young adults in China to get married. This term describes the persistent, often stressful, act of parents, relatives, and even friends “urging” or “hastening” someone's marriage. A deeply rooted cultural phenomenon, 催婚 is most common during family gatherings like Chinese New Year and is a frequent source of generational conflict and anxiety for modern Chinese youth.

• Pinyin (with tone marks): cuī hūn
• Part of Speech: Verb / Noun
• HSK Level: N/A
• Concise Definition: To urge, rush, or pressure someone to get married.
• In a Nutshell: 催婚 isn't just a friendly suggestion to settle down. It's a powerful verb describing a relentless campaign, usually waged by parents and grandparents, to get their adult children married by a certain age. It stems from a mix of genuine concern, deep-seated cultural expectations about family continuity, and social “face.” For the person on the receiving end, it often feels like an interrogation and a source of immense stress.

• 催 (cuī): This character means “to urge,” “to press,” or “to hasten.” It's composed of the person radical (亻) and a phonetic component (崔) that depicts a high mountain. You can imagine a person (亻) being pushed or “urged” to climb a mountain, conveying a sense of pressure and effort.
• 婚 (hūn): This character means “marriage” or “wedding.” It's made of the woman radical (女) and the character for dusk (昏). This combination points to the ancient tradition of holding wedding ceremonies in the evening.

When combined, 催婚 (cuīhūn) literally translates to “urging marriage,” a perfect description of the action it represents.

催婚 is more than just a word; it's a cultural phenomenon that reveals a major pressure point in modern Chinese society.

• Cultural Values: The pressure stems from traditional Confucian values, particularly 孝顺 (xiàoshùn), or filial piety. In this framework, a primary duty of a child is to get married and continue the family line (传宗接代, chuánzōngjiēdài). Remaining single, especially into one's late 20s or 30s, can be seen as unfilial and a source of great anxiety for parents, who may feel they are losing 面子 (miànzi), or social standing.
• Comparison to the West: In Western cultures, a parent might ask, “Are you seeing anyone special?” or express a hope for grandchildren. This is typically viewed as personal curiosity. 催婚, in contrast, is often a direct, systematic, and public campaign. The focus is less on the child's personal happiness or finding a “soulmate” and more on fulfilling a crucial life stage and social duty. The question isn't “Are you happy being single?” but “Why aren't you married yet? What's wrong?”

This difference highlights a collectivist vs. individualistic mindset. In China, marriage has traditionally been viewed as an affair concerning the entire family, not just the two individuals involved.

催婚 is a term you will hear constantly in daily conversations, see in social media memes, and find as a central plot point in many Chinese TV dramas.

• The “When” and “Where”: The pressure reaches its peak during holidays, especially 春节 (Chūnjié) - Chinese New Year, when family members gather and have the opportunity to collectively question single relatives. It also occurs frequently over phone calls and WeChat messages throughout the year.
• The “Who”: The main perpetrators are parents and grandparents. However, aunts, uncles, family friends, and even nosy neighbors (三姑六婆, sāngūliùpó) will often join in.
• Connotation and Tone: For the person being pressured, the term carries an overwhelmingly negative and stressful connotation. It's associated with anxiety, frustration, and a feeling of being misunderstood. For the parents, while their actions cause stress, they often see it as an act of love and responsibility.
• Common Responses: Young people have developed various strategies to cope with 催婚, from outright arguing and avoidance to reluctantly agreeing to 相亲 (xiāngqīn) (arranged blind dates), or even hiring “fake” partners to bring home for the holidays.

• Example 1:
  • 过年回家，我最怕的就是被亲戚催婚。
  • Pīnyīn: Guònián huíjiā, wǒ zuì pà de jiùshì bèi qīnqi cuīhūn.
  • English: When I go home for the New Year, the thing I fear most is being pressured by relatives to get married.
  • Analysis: This is a classic sentence expressing the anxiety associated with 催婚 during major holidays. The passive voice `被 (bèi)` is commonly used to show one is the recipient of the pressure.
• Example 2:
  • 我爸妈又开始催婚了，天天给我发相亲对象的照片。
  • Pīnyīn: Wǒ bàmā yòu kāishǐ cuīhūn le, tiāntiān gěi wǒ fā xiāngqīn duìxiàng de zhàopiàn.
  • English: My parents have started pressuring me to get married again, sending me photos of blind date candidates every day.
  • Analysis: This sentence illustrates a common method of 催婚—arranging blind dates (相亲).
• Example 3:
  • 你别再催婚了，我的事自己会处理！
  • Pīnyīn: Nǐ bié zài cuīhūn le, wǒ de shì zìjǐ huì chǔlǐ!
  • English: Stop pressuring me to get married! I can handle my own affairs!
  • Analysis: This shows a direct, confrontational response to 催婚. `别再…了 (bié zài…le)` is a useful pattern for “stop doing something.”
• Example 4:
  • 很多年轻人为了逃避催婚，选择不回家过年。
  • Pīnyīn: Hěn duō niánqīngrén wèile táobì cuīhūn, xuǎnzé bù huíjiā guònián.
  • English: Many young people, in order to escape the marriage pressure, choose not to go home for the New Year.
  • Analysis: Here, 催婚 is used as a noun—“the marriage pressure.” `逃避 (táobì)` means “to escape” or “to evade.”
• Example 5:
  • A: 你都三十了，怎么还不结婚？ B: 行了妈，别催婚了。
  • Pīnyīn: A: Nǐ dōu sānshí le, zěnme hái bù jiéhūn? B: Xíng le mā, bié cuīhūn le.
  • English: A: You're already 30, why aren't you married yet? B: Alright Mom, stop with the marriage pressure.
  • Analysis: A very typical conversational exchange. Person A's question is the act of 催婚, and Person B identifies it by name.
• Example 6:
  • 这种持续的催婚给我带来了巨大的精神压力。
  • Pīnyīn: Zhè zhǒng chíxù de cuīhūn gěi wǒ dài lái le jùdà de jīngshén yālì.
  • English: This constant pressure to get married has brought me enormous mental stress.
  • Analysis: This sentence uses 催婚 as a noun to describe the source of stress. It's a more formal way to express the feeling, suitable for writing or a serious discussion.
• Example 7:
  • 我不是在催婚，我只是关心你的终身大事。
  • Pīnyīn: Wǒ búshì zài cuīhūn, wǒ zhǐshì guānxīn nǐ de zhōngshēn dàshì.
  • English: I'm not pressuring you to get married, I'm just concerned about your lifelong major event (i.e., your marriage).
  • Analysis: A classic line used by parents to justify their actions. They frame 催婚 not as pressure, but as `关心 (guānxīn)` - care or concern.
• Example 8:
  • आजकल，社交媒体上充满了关于如何应对催婚的段子。
  • Pīnyīn: Xiànzài, shèjiāo méitǐ shàng chōngmǎn le guānyú rúhé yìngduì cuīhūn de duànzi.
  • English: Nowadays, social media is full of jokes and skits about how to deal with marriage pressure.
  • Analysis: This shows the term's relevance in modern pop culture and on the internet. `段子 (duànzi)` refers to short comedic bits or memes.
• Example 9:
  • 她一毕业，家里的催婚大军就开始行动了。
  • Pīnyīn: Tā yī bìyè, jiā lǐ de cuīhūn dàjūn jiù kāishǐ xíngdòng le.
  • English: As soon as she graduated, the “marriage-pressuring army” at home started to take action.
  • Analysis: A vivid and humorous way to describe the collective effort of relatives. `大军 (dàjūn)` means “large army,” exaggerating the scale of the pressure.
• Example 10:
  • 面对父母的催婚，他感到既无奈又烦躁。
  • Pīnyīn: Miànduì fùmǔ de cuīhūn, tā gǎndào jì wúnài yòu fánzào.
  • English: Facing his parents' pressure to marry, he felt both helpless and annoyed.
  • Analysis: This sentence effectively captures the emotional state of someone being subjected to 催婚. The structure `既…又… (jì…yòu…)` means “both…and…”.

• “Urge” vs. “Encourage”: A common mistake for English speakers is to equate 催婚 with “encouraging someone to marry.” The English word “encourage” is too soft and positive. 催婚 implies a nagging persistence and pressure that “encourage” doesn't capture. It's closer to “hound,” “pester,” or “badger someone to marry.”
• Context is Key (Family vs. Friends): While a close friend might “urge” you to marry your long-term partner, the word 催婚 is most strongly associated with the top-down pressure from family elders. If your friend says it once, you'd likely use a word like `建议 (jiànyì - to suggest)` or `劝 (quàn - to persuade)`. If they pester you about it relentlessly like your aunt does, then you could jokingly say `你别催婚了 (Nǐ bié cuīhūn le)`. The key is the feeling of being hassled.
• Incorrect Usage Example:
  • My boyfriend and I are very happy. My best friend thinks we should get married. She is encouraging me.
  • Incorrect: 她在催婚我。(Tā zài cuīhūn wǒ.)
  • Why it's wrong: This sounds like the friend is annoyingly pressuring you, creating stress. If the friend's suggestion is welcome and positive, it's not 催婚.
  • Better: 她鼓励我们结婚。(Tā gǔlì wǒmen jiéhūn.) - She encourages us to get married.

• 相亲 (xiāngqīn) - Blind date; a matchmaking session, often arranged by parents as a direct consequence of their 催婚 efforts.
• 剩女 (shèngnǚ) - “Leftover woman”; a somewhat derogatory term for an educated, urban, unmarried woman over the age of 27. The fear of being labeled a 剩女 is a major societal driver of 催婚.
• 剩男 (shèngnán) - The male equivalent of 剩女, “leftover man.”
• 逼婚 (bīhūn) - A stronger, more aggressive version of 催婚. `逼 (bī)` means “to force.” This is not just urging, but compelling or forcing someone into marriage through extreme measures.
• 孝顺 (xiàoshùn) - Filial piety; the traditional virtue of respect and obedience towards one's parents. Getting married is often seen as a key duty of a filial child.
• 面子 (miànzi) - “Face”; social standing or prestige. A child remaining unmarried can cause the parents to “lose face” in their social circles.
• 晚婚 (wǎnhūn) - Late marriage. From the perspective of many parents, 催婚 is the necessary “solution” to the “problem” of their children's 晚婚.
• 春节 (Chūnjié) - The Spring Festival or Chinese New Year. Known informally as the peak season for 催婚 due to obligatory family reunions.