chū ěr fǎn ěr: 出尔反尔 - To Go Back on One's Word, To Be Fickle

• Keywords: chuerfaner, chū ěr fǎn ěr, 出尔反尔 meaning, Chinese idiom for breaking a promise, fickle, go back on one's word Chinese, inconsistent, unreliable, contradictory, chengyu, Chinese for untrustworthy
• Summary: “出尔反尔” (chū ěr fǎn ěr) is a powerful Chinese idiom (chengyu) used to criticize someone for being unreliable, inconsistent, and going back on their word. It describes a person who breaks promises or contradicts their previous statements, implying a serious lack of integrity. Understanding this term is key to grasping the high value placed on trustworthiness in Chinese culture, as being accused of “chū ěr fǎn ěr” is a significant social critique.

• Pinyin (with tone marks): chū ěr fǎn ěr
• Part of Speech: Chengyu (idiom), Verb Phrase
• HSK Level: HSK 6 (Advanced)
• Concise Definition: To contradict oneself or go back on one's word.
• In a Nutshell: Imagine someone firmly promises you one thing on Monday, but on Tuesday, they do the exact opposite without a good reason. That frustrating and untrustworthy behavior is “出尔反尔”. It's not just about changing your mind; it's about breaking a commitment or being hypocritical. It carries a strong negative connotation and questions a person's character and integrity.

• 出 (chū): To go out; to issue from.
• 尔 (ěr): An archaic word for “you” or “your.”
• 反 (fǎn): To return; to reverse; to go against.
• 尔 (ěr): You; your.

This idiom has a fascinating origin story that has flipped in meaning over time. It comes from the classic text Mencius (《孟子》). The original phrase was “出乎尔者，反乎尔者也” (chū hū ěr zhě, fǎn hū ěr zhě yě), which meant, “Whatever comes from you will return to you.” It was a lesson about karma—if you treat others well, you will be treated well in return. However, the modern usage of 出尔反尔 has lost this original meaning. Today, it describes how a person's words “go out” (出) from “you” (尔), but are later “reversed” or “returned against” (反) by “you” (尔) yourself. It now signifies self-contradiction and breaking a promise.

In Chinese culture, trustworthiness and keeping one's word (守信, shǒuxìn) are paramount virtues. A person's word is seen as a reflection of their honor and character. To 出尔反尔 is to commit a serious social foul, causing one to lose “face” (面子, miànzi) and be deemed unreliable. A useful Western comparison is the phrase “to change one's mind.” While they can overlap, their cultural weight is very different.

• Changing one's mind: This can be neutral or even positive in the West. It might imply flexibility, adaptability, or that you've received new information that led to a better decision.
• 出尔反尔 (chū ěr fǎn ěr): This is almost exclusively negative and judgmental. It implies a moral failing, not intellectual flexibility. It suggests the person is either forgetful, deceitful, or simply doesn't care about their commitments.

Accusing someone of 出尔反尔 is a direct challenge to their integrity (信用, xìnyòng). It’s not a light-hearted comment; it's a way of saying, “Your words mean nothing, and I can no longer trust you.”

This idiom is common in situations where a commitment has been broken.

• Business: This is frequently used in business negotiations. If a company agrees to a price and then tries to change it later, their partner might accuse them of being 出尔反尔. It's a serious claim that can damage a business relationship.
• Personal Relationships: In arguments between friends, family, or partners, it's used to call out broken promises. For example, “You promised you'd be there, how can you be so 出尔反尔?”
• Politics and Media: It's often used to criticize politicians or public figures who change their stance on an issue or fail to deliver on campaign promises.

The connotation is always negative and accusatory. It is a formal idiom but is used in both formal writing and heated informal conversations.

• Example 1:
  • 他在生意上总是出尔反尔，所以没什么人愿意跟他合作。
  • Pinyin: Tā zài shēngyì shàng zǒngshì chū'ěrfǎn'ěr, suǒyǐ méishénme rén yuànyì gēn tā hézuò.
  • English: He always goes back on his word in business, so not many people are willing to cooperate with him.
  • Analysis: This sentence describes a person's general character flaw in a professional context, explaining the negative consequences.
• Example 2:
  • 你昨天答应了帮我，今天又变卦，你这个人怎么能出尔反尔呢？
  • Pinyin: Nǐ zuótiān dāyìng le bāng wǒ, jīntiān yòu biànguà, nǐ zhè ge rén zěnme néng chū'ěrfǎn'ěr ne?
  • English: You promised to help me yesterday, and today you've changed your mind. How can you be so fickle?
  • Analysis: A direct, emotional accusation in a personal setting. The rhetorical question “怎么能…呢？” (zěnme néng…ne?) enhances the tone of frustration.
• Example 3:
  • 一个负责任的政府不应该在政策上出尔反尔。
  • Pinyin: Yí ge fùzérèn de zhèngfǔ bù yīnggāi zài zhèngcè shàng chū'ěrfǎn'ěr.
  • English: A responsible government should not be inconsistent with its policies.
  • Analysis: A formal statement about how an institution should behave. It highlights the expectation of consistency and reliability.
• Example 4:
  • 我们已经签了合同，希望贵公司不要出尔反尔。
  • Pinyin: Wǒmen yǐjīng qiān le hétong, xīwàng guì gōngsī búyào chū'ěrfǎn'ěr.
  • English: We have already signed the contract; we hope your esteemed company will not go back on the agreement.
  • Analysis: A polite but firm warning in a business context. “贵公司” (guì gōngsī) is a respectful term, but the message is a clear expectation of adherence to the contract.
• Example 5:
  • 他出尔反尔的行为让所有人都对他失去了信任。
  • Pinyin: Tā chū'ěrfǎn'ěr de xíngwéi ràng suǒyǒu rén dōu duì tā shīqù le xìnrèn.
  • English: His fickle behavior made everyone lose trust in him.
  • Analysis: Here, “出尔反尔” is used as an adjective to describe “行为” (xíngwéi, behavior).
• Example 6:
  • 做人要讲信用，不能出尔反尔。
  • Pinyin: Zuòrén yào jiǎng xìnyòng, bùnéng chū'ěrfǎn'ěr.
  • English: To be a good person, you must have integrity and cannot go back on your word.
  • Analysis: This sentence states a core cultural value. “做人” (zuòrén) refers to conducting oneself and behaving as a person in society.
• Example 7:
  • 他一会儿说东，一会儿说西，真是出尔反尔。
  • Pinyin: Tā yíhuìr shuō dōng, yíhuìr shuō xī, zhēnshi chū'ěrfǎn'ěr.
  • English: One moment he says east, the next he says west; he's truly inconsistent.
  • Analysis: A classic example of describing someone's contradictory statements. The phrase “一会儿…一会儿…” (yíhuìr…yíhuìr…) perfectly sets up the use of “出尔反尔”.
• Example 8:
  • 在这么重要的事情上，你可千万不能出尔反尔啊！
  • Pinyin: Zài zhème zhòngyào de shìqing shàng, nǐ kě qiānwàn bùnéng chū'ěrfǎn'ěr a!
  • English: On such an important matter, you absolutely must not go back on your word!
  • Analysis: A strong plea or warning to someone. “可千万” (kě qiānwàn) emphasizes the urgency and seriousness of the request.
• Example 9:
  • 那家公司在付款条件上出尔反尔，我们决定取消订单。
  • Pinyin: Nà jiā gōngsī zài fùkuǎn tiáojiàn shàng chū'ěrfǎn'ěr, wǒmen juédìng qǔxiāo dìngdān.
  • English: That company was inconsistent regarding the payment terms, so we decided to cancel the order.
  • Analysis: A clear cause-and-effect sentence in a business scenario, where the fickle behavior leads to a direct consequence.
• Example 10:
  • 我最讨厌出尔反尔的人。
  • Pinyin: Wǒ zuì tǎoyàn chū'ěrfǎn'ěr de rén.
  • English: I most despise people who go back on their word.
  • Analysis: A simple, direct statement of personal values. “出尔反尔” functions as an adjective modifying “人” (rén, person).

• Don't confuse it with simple indecision. A common mistake is to use 出尔反尔 for someone who is just hesitant or can't make up their mind. For that, you should use 犹豫 (yóuyù - to hesitate). 出尔反尔 applies *after* a promise or a clear statement has been made and then broken.
  • Incorrect: 他很出尔反尔，不知道该点什么菜。(He is very fickle, he doesn't know what dish to order.)
  • Correct: 他很犹豫，不知道该点什么菜。(He is very hesitant, he doesn't know what dish to order.)
• Be aware of its strong negative force. Calling someone 出尔反尔 is a serious accusation. In a friendly context, it can sound overly harsh. For a lighter, more colloquial way of saying someone broke a promise, you could use 说话不算数 (shuōhuà bù suànshù - one's words don't count). Using this chengyu can escalate a disagreement.

• 言而无信 (yán ér wú xìn): A very close synonym. It means “to speak but have no credibility/trustworthiness.” Both refer to breaking promises.
• 说话不算数 (shuōhuà bù suànshù): A more colloquial and less formal way to say the same thing. Literally “speaking doesn't count.”
• 反复无常 (fǎnfù wúcháng): A synonym meaning “capricious, erratic, changeable.” It emphasizes unpredictable changes in mood or behavior, while 出尔反尔 focuses more on breaking specific promises or statements.
• 自相矛盾 (zì xiāng máodùn): “To be self-contradictory.” This is more about a logical flaw in someone's argument or statement, whereas 出尔反尔 is about a moral flaw in their commitment.
• 食言 (shíyán): A verb meaning “to break a promise,” literally “to eat one's words.” It's often used in the phrase “食言而肥” (shí yán ér féi - to get fat from eating one's words), a humorous way to criticize someone for breaking promises.
• 一言为定 (yì yán wéi dìng): An antonym. “One word and it's settled.” Used to seal a verbal agreement, showing commitment.
• 一诺千金 (yí nuò qiān jīn): An antonym. “A single promise is worth a thousand pieces of gold.” Emphasizes the immense value of keeping one's word.
• 信用 (xìnyòng): The core cultural concept of “trustworthiness” or “credit” that is violated by someone who is 出尔反尔.
• 守信 (shǒuxìn): The act of keeping one's promise; “to guard one's credibility.” The opposite behavior of 出尔反尔.